I miss

• feeling like I can trust God with anything

• having the confidence of Paul rather than the doubts of Thomas

• my dad’s handkerchief, which seemed magically to appear before the first tear reached my cheek

• God’s joy and presence

• being contented with what I know about God rather than feeling as though I’m missing something

• waking up each day with anticipation and excitement for what adventures the day may hold

Scenes from a recent party

Princess Conner, 4

Korynn, 2

Bert and Jack, 9 mos.

Tyler and Korynn

Old Time Evangelism

Dear lost person

I am concerned for the state of your eternal soul. Have you ever asked Jesus into your heart? No, not your literal heart. I mean your spiritual heart. Yes? Oh good. So you remember every detail about the day you repeated a prayer being led by a certified, licensed Christian. No? Oh dear.

Well surely you at least continued on the path of Christianity by distancing yourself from everyone who could possibly be a bad influence on you, right? I mean, at this stage you’re just a fledgling believer who easily could be misled back to sin and degradation. It might help me to take a peek at your journal to see how closely you’ve followed Jesus’ sayings. What do you mean you don’t have a journal? Didn’t they teach you about writing down your revelations, prayer requests and thoughts about God? And questions don’t count because, as believers, we’re not supposed to question – just accept.

Well, this is truly a sad state of affairs. We may need to take you through a refresher on the Four Spiritual Laws and the ordinance of journaling. It might help, too, for you to go ahead and move out of your neighborhood and find a nice, quiet convent in which to meditate, grow and develop into a fine spiritual leader. You can practice sharing your 5-minute testimony on the deer.

Why I Believe

I've been thinking more about my earlier post and thought I'd share with you part of my journey. I came to the conclusion fairly early in life that there had to be a God. How else do you explain the complexities of life and existence? But how do I make the jump from being an agnostic to being a Christian? Well, I tend to be more analytical than I'd like to admit. See, I know that there were a bunch of guys who faced excruciating deaths because they refused to tell the world that Jesus was a hoax. These men had seen Jesus up close and personal, and even in the face of death they could not deny His existence or character.

What would compel men to forsake all to profess faith in another person? Only the truth: that the other man truly was the Son of God sent to die for the sins of mankind. I can't imagine men accepting torture and death if they knew that Jesus was a hoax. So something about Him must have convinced them to follow Him, even to their own deaths.

But this is my sad confession - perhaps even blasphemous. My faith in God is based more on what I know about Him than what I've experienced. I can't really say I've seen God intervene in an impossible situation and completely turn it around. I don't even know if I could say I've seen a life dramatically transformed by God's presence. And, here come's the blasphemy, I'm not sure I've ever "felt" God like other people say they have.

This saddens me because I want to be someone who testifies of God based on what I've experienced. Unfortunately, after 20 some years of following Him the best I can say is that I follow Him because the evidence has convinced me that there is no other alternative.

Why Believe in God?

Researchers at the University of Oxford are preparing to launch a 3-year study to determine why people believe in God. They want to know whether "belief in a divine being is a basic part of mankind's makeup."

I've never considered the thought that God might not exist. I've met some atheists who challenged me to prove there is a God (like I could), but more interesting would be to see if they could prove He doesn't exist. I've heard many people say they don't believe in a god because if there was one then there wouldn't be the suffering and brokenness we see.

Let's suppose they're right, then. The world's brokenness proves there is no god. But there's still brokenness, poverty, and suffering - so who do we blame now? Greedy people? Indifference? Why can't we blame these attitudes and people for the wrong in the world and still believe there's a god? I guess people want to believe there is a god who would intervene to correct the wrongs in life, but stay out of our business when we want to live according to our own desires and plans. Kind of like a part-time god.

Giant Triumph

Mike is a life-long Giants fan, just like his mum, so last night was quite an evening of celebration in the Conner house.

Early in the game, he was not a happy camper

Our man Eli

Later in the game, Mike couldn't bear to watch

Die-hard fan

History of a knee

About 2 years ago, Mike underwent knee surgery to remove a portion of his Meniscus that was torn while playing indoor soccer. He never recovered full mobility in his knee, and eventually also tore his ACL while playing football. Last week, Mike went in to have ACL reconstructive surgery on his left knee.

Mike waiting for surgery

Recovering post-op

Still sleeping

His new knee

Missing are photos of Mike while recovering at home because, well, he's had a rough recovery. Doctor put him on Diladid - which does a great job at masking the pain but it comes with some nasty side effects. Day 2 after the surgery, Mike was plagued with shakings, heart palpitations, visual hallucinations, panic, nausea and dizziness. Today has been MUCH better. Mike even ventured out for a field trip to Target :) He begins physical therapy tomorrow, and the surgeon is hoping to have him jogging within 10 weeks.