Thursday, August 30, 2012

Of Swingers and Spies

I'm hesitant to write this post because we still are not sure what we are facing. So if I go missing in the next day or so, please assume the worst - either I've been abducted or I've been initiated.

Mike and I have compared notes regarding our new neighborhood and have concluded 2 possible explanations: we either have moved into an enclave of swingers or we unknowingly have infiltrated a hive of espionage. These are the only 2 possible theories for why we never see anyone outside OR if we happen to cross paths with a neighbor, he or she quickly looks away and scurries inside.

Case in point: I have seen the neighbor to our right exactly 1 time in the month we've lived here; I have NEVER seen our neighbor to our left. The one time I saw our neighbor to the right, I happened to walk outside as she emerged from her garage. She walked to the end of her driveway to retrieve her trash can when she saw me. Her eyes widened in surprise and she hurriedly looked away. She grabbed her trash can and ran ... literally, ran ... to her backyard.

Second case: we have put Addie in her wagon and have walked around our neighborhood at least twice. On one occasion, we didn't see a single person outside even though it was a gorgeous evening. The second walk yielded 2 possible people with whom to talk. One was a man who was sweeping out his garage. I said something to him about how I liked the princess castle in his garage. He looked up long enough to make eye contact with me, and then promptly returned to sweeping. During the 2nd encounter, I complemented a woman on how well-behaved her dog was. She must have thought I was mocking her because she huffily explained that her dog was merely excited. I assured her I was impressed with how the dog wasn't running all around like my dog would do. She then huffed (really, that's the only way she knew how to talk) that of course her dog was behaving; he was a on leash. She then strolled away.

So we have concluded that somehow we managed to pick the one neighborhood in Jax that has something to hide. And logically, it must be that either they are all swingers or they all are spies.

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